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The next day after my arrival at New Plymouth I went out with my bullocks and cart, a neighbour's son as driver, in company with other carts to Omata, to see the state of the farm, and bring into town all that I could find available or useful. Judge of my surprise when I saw the complete ruin and desolation of my lovely home. No words can convey the feelings which took possession of my heart, when I looked round and saw in my own farm and house but a type of the real state of things, as touching all the property of my neighbours around. I had left stacks of wheat, oats, and beans; plantations of mangold wurtzel, carrots, potatoes, and other produce of a large and good garden, and, though a
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small, yet a well-cultivated farm. Of the stacks, not a vestige remained, hut the straw and bean haulm worked up into a heap of short litter, the effect of pigs rooting, and cattle constantly treading, after all the grain and the best of the straw were eaten. The ground, covered with root-crops when I left, was bare, and nearly as hard as the road. Fences were broken down to the ground, shrubs and choice plants destroyed, peach trees converted into the shape of umbrella frames, flower borders and paths alike ploughed up by pigs--windows broken, door wide open--the house ransacked and plundered--valuable seeds stolen (I had above £10 worth of onion seed), ruin and destruction too grievous to dwell upon. Thus have I lost at least £120 worth of crops, besides my cattle, sheep, and pigs!
I hastily put together the few things left with a heavy heart, ran down to the "Swiss Cottage," so often visited and as often enjoyed when my dear friend and I dwelt together in the sweetest harmony, love and fellowship;
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and there beheld a scene of wanton destruction which led me inwardly to exclaim, "Oh, war! thou hast blasted our hopes--thou hast demonised the human heart--for even here, in this quiet and lovely spot, where one would have thought peace had found a quiet resting-place, mischief has done its work." At least £50 worth of valuable bulbs, choice--I may say--some of the choicest--plants and shrubs taken away; the papering of the house torn down and carried away; the glass of the neat little conservatory broken, doors torn off their hinges, and everything the adverse of its former trim and quiet beauty. I took a hurried view of other neighbours' houses and gardens, all were alike in this desolate and plundered state!
With a sorrowing heart I sent the cart away, and would have soon followed it into town, but for an indescribable longing to be alone amidst the scenes of my exertions and anxieties, before turning my back on a home which, for eight years, had given me rest and
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peace. When I shall see this spot again, Heaven only knows; and how, if ever I do return to my farm, I shall get the means to bring it into anything like the order in which I left it, is to me a difficult question to solve. If compensation is offered by Government, it will, doubtless, be in land purchased by blood; and even that, if I could accept it, is only in the distant future! That day was a point of my chequered life, and I shall not be thought complaining, if, in dwelling with fond recollection upon every feature of the place so familiar to me, but now so changed, I felt grieved; and my heart was full of emotion, not only on my own account, but also for those hapless neighbours, who, like me, had left their hearths and homes, and who were compelled to fight, if need be, against a foe exasperated by every imaginable wrong which was thought by them to be the result of the white man's increasing power and number. I felt sorrowful, too, at the change; for no longer the familiar faces of those who gladdened my path in life were to
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be seen. I had witnessed in town the effects of the change of life and the endurance of bitter trials on many of my kind, good neighbours, in their pale and emaciated faces, and fervently did I pray that their present wretched mode of life might soon end. Used to comfort, cleanliness of the highest order, and the quiet of an affectionate circle, what must they have endured to be cooped up in a garrison amongst drunken, swearing, and dirty, ignorant men? And the worst feature of the whole, no hope of a happier state of things, but a long-protracted, dreary dragging on of unmeaning events, waiting on an unsatisfactory settlement of the question as affecting the two races. I could not but feel and say to myself, "Taranaki is fallen! and New Zealand will long bow down its head like a bulrush! This lovely climate and improvable soil, with all its mineral wealth and susceptibilities of progress, will be for a very long time but a fond recollection, or a pleasing dream long dwelling on the hopeful heart."
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There are circumstances in life which make us seek for solitude under the pressure of intense emotion, when we have neither language to express them to ourselves, nor loved ones in whose silent eyes we may read kindred feelings, and find a sympathy which wants no words to portray.
The thoughts of a home that I had made-- the little house where I had spent nearly nine years--the scene of my labours, my joys and sorrows, hopes and disappointments--caused my imagination to call up the fearful effects of war, the full horrors of its devastating power, and I felt humbled in the sight of God; for perhaps I had too highly prized my household gods, and this particular spot of the wide-spreading world.
There, in all its solitary sweetness and quiet beauty--beauty which happily could not be easily destroyed--it lay before me. A last long lingering look, and I then turned my back upon it, feeling that I should not again tread the ground watered by the sweat of my brow,
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and made almost sacred to me by the often-enjoyed (with inexpressible luxury) converse with sweet Nature. I had almost worshipped her. The flowers, the bees, the trees, all kindled a delightful train of ideas and emotions, which raised my mind to the sublime conception of God, and bestowed the spiritual enjoyment of communion in holy worship of Him, "who hath made of one blood all nations of the earth."
I was thankful that thus undisturbed I enjoyed this exquisite pleasure, and I turned my feet towards the town with much better spirits than I could have thought it possible when I first saw the place that day.
If I seem minute in my description of circumstances, and in the relation of my sensations, let those who read my narrative remember, that such little incidents and reflections are, to a considerable extent, a fair representation of what, no doubt, other settlers in Taranaki experience as the result of this unhappy war.
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I made application to the military authorities for the discharge of my son Thomas, and although furnished with a clear certificate of his unfitness for military duty from the medical officer, yet I was bandied about from one office to another, until within a few moments of the steamer "Airedale" leaving for the south. I was compelled at last to leave without obtaining this desirable document; and so it may be that he will yet be called into this hateful service again. I was determined, however, not to leave him behind; and I did, therefore, what I think every one else in my situation would have done--got into the boat with my son, just as it was about to leave the shore. The health of my son is very much impaired by the exposure and neglect that he suffered while in the garrison at Omata. His illness arose from inflammation of the lungs.
The weather was rough and the sea boisterous, which made it rather doubtful if the steamer would wait in the open roadstead for
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us, and several times the boatmen exclaimed, "She is off!" But still they pulled away most heartily, and it was a pleasing excitement to see how beautifully they managed the boat, and kept her head up against the tremendous waves, while she rode buoyantly on till we reached the steamer.
My son was so weak, that in attempting to swing himself from the boat on to the steamer, he nearly fell into the sea; but, fortunately, the ship at the moment gave a lurch towards the boat, and we caught him, and then pushed him on board in the best way we could. I had left on the beach packages and boxes to take with me, but owing to the roughness of the weather, I had to leave them there in the charge of a friend, and we proceeded on our passage with only a carpet bag. This was most unfortunate, as there was a bale of blankets and some boys' clothing, and the boxes contained warm clothes, &c. My son and I both suffered from sea-sickness; he was, however, greatly benefited by the passage, and
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we were both only too glad to set our feet on terra firma, and once more to join the family circle.
After my return from Taranaki the tables seemed turned somewhat in my favour. I met with kind-hearted friends, and I succeeded in obtaining an appointment as teacher to a Government school, at a salary of £80 per annum. How long this may last is rather doubtful, for although the system adopted here for general unsectarian education is an admirable one, yet, unfortunately, the parents of the children seem not sufficiently to appreciate it, to make it certain that a sufficient average number will attend to ensure the amount of salary I have named, and a less one would render it difficult to maintain my position. Rightly enough, if a certain average number daily cannot be shown, a reduction in the teacher's salary is made.
Behold me then, dear reader, daily engaged in the "delightful task, to teach the young idea how to shoot;" always anxious to learn
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the news from Taranaki, and hopefully looking forward to a safe and speedy settlement of this most unhappy quarrel.
Every trip of the steamer brings us sad, and still sadder news! Fathers and husbands murdered, brothers shot and tomahawked, houses burnt, even under the very nose of nearly 2,000 soldiers cooped up in town; horses and cattle driven away in the very teeth of a fortified garrison; unmeaning expeditions set on foot, dragging the poor settlers and soldiers along dreary miles of muddy, heavy roads, through rivers, and along the loose, heavy iron-sand; women forced to leave their husbands and homes by the not-to-be-resisted persuasion of the bayonet; all terminating in nothing but disasters to the settlers and their property, and a still more and more complicated state of the quarrel, which many persons think might have been settled without adopting military force; or if, when once adopted, promptness and vigour had been pursued, the insurgent natives would have
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been subdued. Whereas now they are the besiegers of the beleaguered town, and the military are only tarnishing the name of Britain, and bringing disgrace on that "man-slaying profession" in which Englishmen glory, and for which the world has given them credit as being greatly proficient.
It has often been pleaded, "The Governor could not with honour have avoided the conflict with Wiremu Kingi and his natives;"-- but I am reminded in this of what was once said by Sir Robert Peel. "In my opinion," said he, "no motive can be more justly branded as ignominious than that which is usually termed cowardice. But there is a temper of mind much more dangerous than this-- though it may not be so base--I mean, the fear of being thought to be afraid. Base as a coward is, the man who abandons himself to the fear of being thought a coward displays little more fortitude."
There are many subjects which it might be impossible for his Excellency to contemplate
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without dread--many views from which he might have been fully justified in shrinking before declaring war, or proclaiming martial law; viz., the ruin of the settlements of Taranaki--the desolation of the settlers' homes-- the sorrows overwhelming the hearts of widows, orphans, and bereaved sisters and friends, at the untimely death of those dear to them--the destruction of the hopeful prospects of industrious and self-denying men --the sad forebodings of their irretrievable losses, and the consequent waste of many years of toil and hardships.
But as we are none of us prophets of the future, and the weakness of humanity clings to governor as well as to the governed, we cannot do better (while justly deprecating this unrighteous war) than earnestly to pray to Almighty God so to guide our councillors, legislators, and ruler, that by the exercise of that "wisdom which cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of a turning,"
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they may he able to bring about a speedy and safe adjustment of this most unhappy quarrel, before it extends into a fierce, cruel, and general contention between the two races now inhabiting these islands.
